Cont... (on wasting away productively)

Day #42.
My celebrity attention is waning. They make me do household chores now. Its getting bad, so I had to think of survival strategies that keeps me going.

For instance, mom just decided our house needed a round of cleaning. She decided. And I was rudely pulled away from my laptop which they call my "harmonium". And sure, I thought I'll genuinely help her this time. We started with the PC. She was brushing dust off the keyboard while I spotted accumulated dust on CPU's fan. I timidly tried poking it with earbuds till they were confident enough to let me go full scale with a screwdriver.
It was Onam/Vishu come early! Ahhhh..!
I dusted the dirt onto the circuit board, and then upturned the whole thing and thumped on it's back. Trying to relieve a fat baby with gas troubles. The PC works better now.
And it did leave me a souvenier in gratitude - an unidentified plastic object that flew out and fits nowhere. It didnt look like an important component anyway.

Things are changing, they are getting used to me. People are getting insulted by my humor sense. I laughed at a bus that would take me to Navel base. They didn't like it. It appears to my family, that I'm spoilt. Frankly, it's the voices in their head speaking.
But I wouldn't dare say that out loud. Instead, I'll have to go out and get it myself. Not to mention the enormous effort I'd have to put up with to appear civilized.

What if someone kidnapped me on my way to buy ice-cream? Or worse, what if he leaves me behind and runs- off with MY chocolatey- crispy-mhh-(add a lot of adjectives)-icecream?

And it gets even confusing..

My gran can spot a well camouflaged mosquito from the next room and hunt it down with the electrical bat. Yet, she seems to think its me singing when she sees Andrea Jane from Corrs. Did you hear that yedu?

What vacation has in store for you - A loose end study on your short leisurely life

I am home.
Currently reclaiming childhood with acts of tantrums, occasional jumping on bed, asking (getting) up to three extra helpings on desserts, and blankly staring at products in aesthetically wrapped covers to my liking till mom complies and it goes to the shopping cart.

Last week, mom caught me sitting inside (a really spacious) wardrobe looking (nothing in particular - you never know what's inside). She was amused to see her 22 year old crouching on top of clothes, and she stood there laughing. Had this happened 10 years back, I would be nursing a red spot in my arm and giving her silent treatment till she tempts me with treats.
Ah, the good old days.

Oh wait. I'm still there.

You become a local celebrity - Shop owners knocks off the change, fruit seller guy would be kind with the rates and everyone's looking at the new (ahem!) chick who came back with shorter hair and lesser body fat.
I feel pretty...oh sooo pretty! (Think about Adam Sandler singing that in Anger management)
I was about to miss my bus today, when the driver saw me raising my hand 25 metres away, awkwardly, and he gestured that he'll wait for me, if I'd just run along! Disclaimer: I'm not his everyday passenger and it was just my second time.

And my hand gesture wasn't waving, it was me showing off my cool five fingers. Yet, the reckless overspeeding bus stood there, waiting.
People love me! I do not want to think of the other side. (Ignore: reckless, overspeeding bus)

Everyone wants to take you out- Recently, Asia's largest mall in the city popped up and presto! we have a tourist spot where people take pictures of their friends looking at things they can't/don't want to buy. Its the new trendsetter, I assure you.
Imagine this, you just came back from an expedition to Mars and was just about to brag to your homies. They welcome you with, "Duudee, you still look shitty. Guess what? They have ice rink too!"
You'll be like, "Whaa?" And then you are transported into the world of human trafficiking.
Only in a different sense altogether. You will be dodging between children let loose, a crowd of high-heeled ladies and lost individuals. Again, not lost in the geographical sense, but lost to themselves. Random thoughts include -

> Was my teeth that yellow or is it the glass pane/ lights? (I hope that girl in skirts doesn't notice) and puts on a stony expression.

> If I bought that, I'd have to walk home.

> How cool is my new ringtone/graphic tee/ ridiculously painted nails? Yeaaahhh...look at me, bitches!

> I'll try blending in by walking in circles

> In the lift - How bad do I smell? (And then they take deep breaths)

You find yourself agreeing to things you hated, because its been a long time. Like wearing that "costume" you don't want to be seen dead with, but its a present. Or visiting that relative who always smelt of smoke. Or doing domestic chores like stripping a dry coconut from its persistent coat.

If you are led to believe that I got more share of attention than I deserve, meet Baaa..!

Hmm..that's what I thought too!