On a totally unrelated note, I hate lizards. Despise their very existence. That's one creature that makes me re-think on the whole idea of evolution. No, 'm not complaining. I would rather eat an ice-cream cone than swinging upside down from trees. And on a related note, i.e related to my previously unrelated anti-lizard campaign, once a salesman materialised at my door with his non-patented, assorted junk. I usually make it a point to show an uninterested face throughout the show so as to subtly tell them I'm not buying any of their products. But this guy had the, answer I was looking for. A "thing", (I'll cal it as the thing, because it doesn't deserve a name for reasons you'l see later). So, this thing supposedly puts an end to the miserable human-lizzy co-existance. 'm sorry, my face lit up, so did his. Two happy humans looking at each other. He saw his way in. And I saw the way out for those ugly miniature monsters.
"Mom?? I waaant that thing!!"
Of course I got it. Pampered pet gets what she wants in those good old days of childhood. Sigh.
And this magical novelty's price wasnt listed in the pack, I should have been more careful, but what the hell, I want those things out of the house and I was ready to pay. It had 5 pieces with a double sided tape on its rear end, all I had to do was stick it to the walls, specifically on their hangout areas. I proudly climbed the chair propped on table (I dont believe in stepladder, lesser chances of adventure, if you know what I mean) and stuck, stuck and STUCK them everywhere!!
Nothing happened. Maybe its a slow learner, and I was understanding. A day went by..A week.. A month. I imagined the frequency of their haunting to be going down. I was unbelievably patient, till one day our maid accidentally knocked it down, and I went to investigate. There, it was my fallen war-hero. And guess what? The "thing" I fondly gazed upon everyday was harbouring lizard's eggs. It turned itself into a nest for salamander babies.
Does your parents hate it when you wake them up in the middle of night? Of course they do, why are you even nodding? I can turn into a female Minotaur myself. What am I getting at, eH? A fail-safe way to wake others up for no reason and get away with it.
This happened yest night at 1:40am.
At- Bedroom. Chars- mom and myself.
Me: Amma, ammaaa..!! (make sure you speak n hushed tones, and speak really fast)
Mom: mmhh..??
Me: there's someone walking in our compound.. you hear that?
Mom: (springs up, fully awake)
(We spent the next 2mins scanning the neighborhood through the curtains)
Mom: I dont see anything..check if the front doors are locked.
Me: (No. I will not get up. Let him walk up to me, if he wants to)
Oh, its probably nothing. Besides, the bedrooms are secure. Why dont we just go to sleep?
We did, or maybe I did. I dunno about mom, but I did hear something.
P.S : Those who thought I was gonna post a narrative on my smelly feet, BAZINGAA! In fact, my feet smells quite nice.
Thats all folks!
